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The Scrivener

Man, my face is huge.

Leequilibrium; professional escapist, badger-botherer and all-around general lazy git. Despite having a relatively passive and reserved outer-nature, the things that seem to get me the most riled up and frothing at the mouth (in a good way) are ridiculously loud, furiously large in scope and can typically be described by that largely detested and often misused adjective – “epic”. We’re talking genuinely epic, like standing naked on a mountaintop with your junk flapping around everywhere in the gale-force wind, watching a visceral battle unfold below between two armies of polar bears with radically opposing extremist moral and political outlooks, whilst Hans Zimmer orchestrates the score to the entire spectacle. Also Hans Zimmer is naked. Then you realise that YOU are Hans Zimmer and you’re generally quite impressed by the whole scene.  Whether we’re talking about literature, music or film, I love anything that tells a story and that’s uncomfortably grandiose and fantastical. Bombast isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

But as I mentioned – I’m not much of a surface guy. I tend to internalise everything, so I might often just seem like a boring twat. In fact, that might still be accurate, but deep down inside I’m far more enthusiastic about being a boring twat than may seem apparent.

That being said, I’m still fairly easy-going and simple enough to strike up a conversation with! I also enjoy a good drink (and a bad drink, for that matter… anything that contains a spot o’ the sauce – mouthwash’ll do) and when the drinks start going down, the blather begins to flow thicker and faster – so if you want some overly-enthusiastic yet mildly incomprehensible natter, dish out the Scotch. Otherwise, you’ll have to settle for a passionate, yet sensibly subdued discussion.

However, if you’re the sort of person that gets inordinately (yet internally) excited by “that song” or “that scene” – so much so that we can just sit together in silence, aurally imbibing that musical nectar, not indulging in verbal communication, the gleaming sheen of drool seeping through our ratty ginger beards communicating a beauteous ecstasy far more eloquently than words ever could – then I’d love for us to hang out with a record on, sometime.

When I’m not in a near-comatose state with melodies slithering in and out of my ears like musical brain-massaging snakes, I’m usually wasting my relatively short amount of time on this earth with other forms of meaningless but enchanting escapism; namely video games, but also movies and (to a gradually lessening extent) books. They might seem like an unorthodox choice, but music and video games are honestly my favourite medium for story. Books and film might seem like the obvious choice (because they are), but I find that nothing wraps me up and carries me away in a perceived narrative like an intricately-constructed album or a phenomenally immersive video game. I feel this is my most plausible justification for spending so much of my time sitting down. I’m not lazy, I’m just burdensomely imaginative.

Top Song of 2012: Wintersun – ‘Sons of Winter and Stars